Food and Drink
‘I Was Told There Would Be Soup’: Carved Pumpkin On Doorstep Gives First Interview Since Halloween
It is 1 November, and on a doorstep in a quiet cul-de-sac, a carved pumpkin is slowly becoming a different shape. Its…
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Food and Drink
Food and Drink
Food and Drink
‘I’ve Been Crisping Since 1pm, Which Is Now Also 1pm’: Exhausted Roast Potato Speaks Out As Clocks Go Back
The clocks go back this weekend, which means that by 4pm on Sunday the nation will be eating its roast dinner in…
Digestive Biscuit Announces It Is Now ‘High Protein’ After Seeing What Everything Else Is Up To
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE. ISSUED FROM THE BISCUIT TIN, SECOND SHELF, BEHIND THE GOOD MUGS. A digestive biscuit has today announced that it…
Food and Drink
OPINION: I’ve Put Protein In Everything I Own And I’m Now Technically A Gym, Says Man
I would like to begin by saying that I am not a gym person. I have a gym membership, which is different.…
Food and Drink
Man Who Just Wanted a Normal Yoghurt Gently Escorted From Chilled Aisle After Failing to Find One With Fewer Than 25g of Protein
Colin Hartley, 47, a facilities coordinator from Swindon, entered the chilled aisle of his local supermarket at 6.40pm on Tuesday with a…
Man who ordered ‘artisan sourdough’ at Wetherspoons finally released from hospital
A Nottingham man has been discharged from Queen’s Medical Centre after spending three weeks recovering from what doctors are describing as “severe…
Pret launches ‘Subscription Fatigue Subscription’ for customers too tired to remember which food services they’re paying £25 a month for
Pret A Manger has announced a new monthly subscription service designed specifically for customers who can no longer keep track of which…
Food and Drink
Britain’s pubs to start charging £2 ‘atmosphere supplement’ for groups who sit in silence staring at phones
The British Beer & Pub Association has announced a £2 per person ‘atmosphere supplement’ to be charged at participating establishments nationwide, effective…
Food and Drink
UK’s last remaining Wetherspoons carpet to be granted Grade II listed status
Historic England has announced plans to grant Grade II listed status to the final surviving original Wetherspoons carpet, a 23-year-old geometric monstrosity…
Food and Drink
British public mourns loss of ‘yellow sticker detective’ skills as dynamic pricing comes to supermarket shelves
The nation is in mourning this week following confirmation that major UK supermarkets will be rolling out electronic shelf labels, effectively ending…