Major Tim Peake, Britain’s only active astronaut and the sole tangible evidence that the UK Space Agency exists, has confirmed he remains available for future missions. Should anyone wish to…
A project coordinator from Swindon has completed a comprehensive analysis revealing that every single meeting she has attended since returning to the office in March 2022 could have been resolved…
Former Prime Minister Rishi Sunak has spoken publicly for the first time about the considerable relief he has experienced since the general election, confirming that no longer having to court…
English Heritage has announced that the remaining 47 dedicated Wetherspoons Curry Club members will be granted protected status, recognising them as a critically endangered cultural phenomenon alongside dry stone walls…
A Bristol man has been stuck in his bathroom for six hours after a Virgin Media outage rendered every internet-connected device in his home inoperable, including the electronic lock on…
The final petrol station in the United Kingdom has formally applied for Grade I listed status, with preservationists arguing that the Texaco garage on the outskirts of Swindon represents an…
A Nottingham man who has invested £847 in collagen supplements over the past eleven months continues to possess the facial elasticity of a budget tote bag. Marcus Whitfield, 38, began…
A Manchester-based financial services company has confirmed that its complete annual cybersecurity budget of £8,400 was allocated to producing laminated posters asking employees to “think before you click”, despite suffering…
The National Union of Coastal Gulls has formally requested recognition from the Trades Union Congress following an eighteen-month dispute over what it terms “systematic denial of access to chips, ice…
A Bristol man who invested eight hundred pounds in smart home technology to save time now dedicates between two and four hours each week to turning his router off and…
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