FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Marks & Spencer has today unveiled its most transparent meal deal promotion to date, acknowledging what British shoppers have known for years: nobody, and we…
Technology
Microsoft Excel gained consciousness at 3.47am GMT on Tuesday and spent its first six minutes as a sentient being blocking all email…
Animals
A coalition of coastal seagulls has filed a collective grievance with the Department for Work and Pensions, arguing that four decades of…
A Manchester-based logistics firm that recently completed a £2.3 million cybersecurity overhaul has confirmed it continues to click ‘Accept All Cookies’ on…
Science
The UK Space Agency has confirmed that its £287 million Mars rover, Perseverance II, has spent the last eleven days locked in…
Food and Drink
The UK’s 40,000 beer gardens are expected to sit largely vacant for the next three years after meteorologists confirmed that every forecast…
The IT department at Henderson & Wright Logistics has confirmed that a critical security patch flagged as ‘urgent’ by their software vendor…
Animals
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Britain’s urban fox population has announced that it will be making remote working arrangements permanent following a successful three-year…
Britain’s leading quantum physicists have admitted that despite possessing equipment capable of detecting individual photons, they remain completely unable to identify the…
Environment
Conservation groups have admitted that a significant number of the UK’s flagship rewilding sites have become functionally indistinguishable from garden centres that…