English Heritage has announced that the remaining 47 dedicated Wetherspoons Curry Club members will be granted protected status, recognising them as a critically endangered cultural phenomenon alongside dry stone walls…
A Bristol man has been stuck in his bathroom for six hours after a Virgin Media outage rendered every internet-connected device in his home inoperable, including the electronic lock on…
The final petrol station in the United Kingdom has formally applied for Grade I listed status, with preservationists arguing that the Texaco garage on the outskirts of Swindon represents an…
A Nottingham man who has invested £847 in collagen supplements over the past eleven months continues to possess the facial elasticity of a budget tote bag. Marcus Whitfield, 38, began…
A Manchester-based financial services company has confirmed that its complete annual cybersecurity budget of £8,400 was allocated to producing laminated posters asking employees to “think before you click”, despite suffering…
The National Union of Coastal Gulls has formally requested recognition from the Trades Union Congress following an eighteen-month dispute over what it terms “systematic denial of access to chips, ice…
A Bristol man who invested eight hundred pounds in smart home technology to save time now dedicates between two and four hours each week to turning his router off and…
A Nottingham man who purchased a screen-accurate replica of Link’s Master Sword from The Legend of Zelda has confirmed that its primary function is now serving as a pointing device…
A colony of Eurasian beavers released into the River Thames watershed as part of Natural England’s rewilding initiative has submitted formal relocation paperwork citing ‘irreconcilable aesthetic differences’ with their designated…
A three-year study by the University of Bristol has concluded that Britain’s hedgehog population is experiencing widespread sleep disruption caused by the nation’s 6.8 million video doorbells. The research, which…
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