The Prime Minister has confirmed a significant Cabinet reshuffle this morning, with promotion decisions based exclusively on which ministers demonstrated a functional understanding of the mute button during yesterday’s three-hour…
JD Wetherspoon has announced plans to launch an exclusive fine dining concept following what the company is calling “an isolated incident of culinary excellence” at its Crawley branch last Tuesday.…
A Berkshire man has reportedly been living in partial darkness for six weeks after his integrated smart home system became too complex for human operation. James Whitmore, 42, began his…
IT security teams across Britain are preparing to sacrifice their Bank Holiday Monday to the ancient and thoroughly unwinnable battle of explaining to colleagues that adding an exclamation mark to…
The National Union of Grey Squirrels has announced that 73 per cent of its membership voted in favour of reducing the working week from five days to three in return…
Researchers at Imperial College London have concluded a three-month study demonstrating that the British public will purchase and consume virtually any substance if told it optimises their gut microbiome. The…
A Derbyshire man who installed an air source heat pump eighteen months ago has reportedly gone an entire weekend without bringing it up, marking what his family are calling a…
ChillTech Solutions, a Milton Keynes-based manufacturer of internet-connected refrigeration units, has confirmed that the company maintains no records, interest, or indeed awareness of what happens to its products once they…
The government has confirmed the creation of a dedicated Cabinet-level position to manage the increasingly complex process of explaining why policies announced last week are no longer applicable this week.…
The nation’s largest purveyor of £2.49 pints and carpets that tell stories nobody wants to hear has announced a dramatic shift in direction after accidentally employing a man with a…
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