A Nottingham man remains confined to his bedroom after a Virgin Media outage rendered every device in his supposedly intelligent home completely useless. Tom Hargreaves, 34, has been unable to open his blinds, silence his alarm, unlock his door, or operate his toilet for nearly eleven hours.
The ordeal began at 6:47am when Hargreaves’s smart alarm began playing whale sounds at full volume. The alarm, which cost £89 and requires an app to operate, cannot be switched off manually. The off button is decorative.
Hargreaves then attempted to open his bedroom blinds, which he had automated for £340 using a system described on the box as ‘intuitive’. The blinds have no cord. They have no chain. They are controlled entirely via Bluetooth connection to a router that is currently receiving no signal.
“I tried to leave the room to reset the router, but I’d replaced all the door handles last month,” said Hargreaves, speaking through the door to his neighbour. “The smart lock cost £310. It’s got a fingerprint scanner and an app. It doesn’t have a key. Why would it have a key? That would be antique.”
The door handle’s manufacturer, HomeFuture Inc, confirmed that their products require constant internet connectivity. A manual override exists but necessitates a £12.99 monthly subscription to their Premium Safety Service, which Hargreaves does not have.
The situation deteriorated further at approximately 9:15am when Hargreaves needed to use his toilet. The smart toilet, purchased for £380 during a January sale, offers heated seats, ambient lighting, and automatic flushing via motion sensors that sync with the home network. It does not offer a manual flush lever, which the manufacturer’s website describes as ‘outdated and unhygienic’.
“I’ve got a first-class degree from Durham,” Hargreaves said. “I work in project management. I own a cafetière. And I’m seriously considering whether I can lower myself out of a second-floor window because I need a piss and my toilet has forgotten how to be a toilet.”
Jennifer Okoye, customer service supervisor at HomeFuture Inc, said the situation was regrettable but not covered under warranty. “Our devices are designed to work seamlessly within a connected ecosystem,” she explained. “If customers choose to remove connectivity from that ecosystem, we can’t be held responsible for the natural consequences. Have you tried turning your Wi-Fi off and on again?”
When informed that this was the problem rather than the solution, Okoye suggested Hargreaves purchase their new SmartHub Pro device, which offers 4G backup connectivity for £299.
At time of publication, Hargreaves was attempting to dismantle his door handle using a nail file. He has so far removed two screws but reports the handle is ‘still quite firmly attached’ and that he ‘doesn’t want to damage the paintwork’.
Virgin Media estimates service will resume by Thursday.
