Author

James Whitford

James joined Made Up News straight out of university, where he studied journalism at Cardiff and graduated with a dissertation on the cultural impact of the football transfer window. He is the youngest member of the team and the only one who knows what TikTok is. He once went viral for a tweet about Greggs and has been dining out on it ever since, figuratively speaking. He cannot afford to dine out literally.

Food and Drink

M&S Launches ‘Summer Body’ Colin the Caterpillar with 40% Less Filling

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Marks & Spencer has today unveiled its most body-positive initiative yet: a limited edition ‘Summer Body’ Colin the Caterpillar…

James Whitford · 5 July 2026

Food and Drink

Michelin-starred restaurant extends ‘no phones’ policy to chefs forgetting what they’re cooking

A two-Michelin-starred restaurant in Mayfair has announced that its widely praised ban on customer mobile phones will now extend to the kitchen,…

James Whitford · 14 June 2026

Food and Drink

Britain’s pubs to begin charging ‘sunlight tax’ as June beer gardens actually usable for third consecutive day

Pubs across Britain have announced a new “sunlight surcharge” following the unprecedented third consecutive day of weather that didn’t require a full…

James Whitford · 7 June 2026

Food and Drink

Gastropubs Legally Required to Offer Minimum One ‘Nduja Dish Under New Regulations

The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs has announced sweeping new legislation requiring all establishments identifying as gastropubs to feature at…

James Whitford · 31 May 2026

Automotive

Nation’s electric car owners celebrate fifth anniversary of still not knowing which rapid charger will actually work today

Electric vehicle drivers across Britain are today marking a half-decade of absolute chaos, commemorating five full years of downloading apps they’ll use…

James Whitford · 28 May 2026

Food and Drink

Wetherspoons to rebrand all ‘Buddha Bowl’ menu items as ‘Enlightenment Basins’ following customer confusion

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE JD Wetherspoon, the pub chain synonymous with sticky carpets and £1.99 breakfasts, has today announced a comprehensive rebranding of…

James Whitford · 24 May 2026

Food and Drink

Wetherspoons to Launch Michelin-Star Dining Experience After Accidentally Serving Food at Correct Temperature

JD Wetherspoon has announced plans to launch an exclusive fine dining concept following what the company is calling “an isolated incident of…

James Whitford · 17 May 2026

Food and Drink

Wetherspoons to start serving ‘artisanal’ £8.50 pints after accidentally hiring someone with a beard

The nation’s largest purveyor of £2.49 pints and carpets that tell stories nobody wants to hear has announced a dramatic shift in…

James Whitford · 10 May 2026

Food and Drink

Waitrose confirms new ‘Essential’ range will still cost more than your actual essentials

Waitrose has unveiled its reimagined Essential range this week, promising to deliver affordable basics to families across the UK, provided those families…

James Whitford · 3 May 2026

Food and Drink

Man who ‘doesn’t really like spice’ orders Nando’s medium for third date, regrets everything

A Nottingham man is tonight questioning every decision that led him to a Nando’s booth, sweating through a chicken burger he actively…

James Whitford · 19 April 2026