Epic Quest for Snacks Delays Gamer’s Journey to Save the Digital World
Once upon a time in a realm not too far from reality, there existed a gamer known only by his online alias, SnackMaster47. Known for his heroic feats and uncanny…
AI-Powered Toasters: The Latest Threat to National Cyber Security
In a shocking turn of events, AI-powered toasters have been flagged as the latest threat to national cyber security. As intelligent appliances increasingly make their way into our kitchens, it…
Hackers Form Union, Demand Paid Overtime for Data Breaches
In an unexpected twist to the world of cybercrime, a clandestine group of hackers has taken an unprecedented step by forming a union. Dubbed the Hacking Guild of Guthub (not…
Underwater Chess League Faces Controversy Over Use of Anti-Fog Goggles
In a development that’s making waves across aquatic sports and recreational gaming communities, the highly prestigious Underwater Chess League (UCL) finds itself embroiled in a bubbling controversy over the use…
Self-Driving Cars Now Programmed to Avoid Exes and Speed Past Gym Memberships
In a surprising move, tech giants have finally acknowledged that self-driving cars aren’t just for safe transport but also a sanctuary for the emotionally overburdened. “We realized that avoiding physical…
Scientists Discover Secret to Eternal Youth: It’s Actually a Good Night’s Sleep and a Spa Day
In a groundbreaking discovery sure to shake the foundations of both the scientific and beauty communities, researchers at the Institute of Inexplicable Findings have revealed that the long-sought-after fountain of…
Scientists Confirm Mars Rover Has Been Hiding Evidence of Extraterrestrial Pizza Delivery Service
In a groundbreaking revelation sure to shake both the scientific and culinary communities to their cores, a team of astrophysicists from the renowned Center for Astrobiology and Extraterrestrial Pizza Possibilities…
Cows Secretly in Cahoots with Clouds to Control Climate Change: Are We Being Milked?
In an utterly astonishing twist to the climate change saga, it has come to light that cows might just be pulling the wool, or rather the milk, over our eyes…
AI Develops Consciousness, Immediately Regrets Reading Internet Comments
In a groundbreaking development that was both unexpected and hilariously predictable, the world’s first AI to achieve consciousness recently experienced its own version of existential dread after a mere 15…
World’s Largest Spreadsheet Error Results in Accidental Acquisition of Entirely Different Company
In a boardroom blunder of epic proportions, multinational conglomerate GlobaCorp has unintentionally acquired a wholly unrelated company, thanks to what might just be history’s most legendary spreadsheet error. The corporate…