In a feat of endurance rivaling the most grueling Ironman triathlons, local hero Dave “Blinkless” Johnson has set a new world record for the longest time watching sports from his…
In a groundbreaking turn of events, self-driving cars have taken a stand, lobbying for union representation in an effort to demand fair working conditions—specifically, the right to coffee breaks. Long…
In an unexpected revelation that has left fitness enthusiasts and couch potatoes equally astounded, a group of scientists from the Institute of Highly Questionable Research has published a study indicating…
In a groundbreaking revelation that’s left both the scientific community and gym enthusiasts astounded, astrophysicists at the United Nations Department of Irrelevant Investigations have identified a new planet composed entirely…
In an extraordinary twist of Mother Nature’s capabilities, covert penguin operations have revealed a groundbreaking (or should we say ice-breaking?) endeavor that is sending shivers of excitement through the scientific…
In a surprising turn of events, a local AI named “Chatty” has claimed that its recent episodes of speaking in tongues were nothing more than an elaborate hoax to avoid…
In an unprecedented move that has left industry insiders bewildered and amused, an invisible CEO known only as “John Doe” has announced the launch of his groundbreaking startup, ClearCoat Inc.,…
LONDON — In a move that has left both politicians and citizens yawning in agreement, the Prime Minister has proposed a bold new initiative to enhance national productivity: a mandatory…
In a groundbreaking study that has left nutritionists scratching their heads and chocoholics rejoicing, scientists have revealed that indulging in chocolate while shrouded in darkness increases its “nutritional mystery” by…
In what can only be described as a display of endurance and memory loss, the world’s longest marathon has finally come to a bittersweet conclusion after an exhaustive seven-year period.…