In what is being described as “the most baffling helpdesk ticket of the year,” a local man named Dave Thompson found himself at the center of an unexpected linguistic mystery when his microwave started speaking fluent French during a routine dinner reheat.
According to the helpdesk report submitted late Tuesday evening, Dave was simply trying to warm up his leftover spaghetti Bolognese when his microwave suddenly came to life with an impeccable Parisian accent. “Bonsoir, monsieur. Votre repas sera prêt en deux minutes,” the device reportedly announced before continuing to recite obscure French culinary trivia and even offered cooking tips that Dave himself struggled to understand.
“The first time it happened, I thought maybe I’d accidentally triggered some hidden ‘French chef’ mode,” Dave explained in his ticket, “but then it started asking me if I preferred ‘sauce béarnaise or hollandaise’ and whether I wanted to practice my ‘bonjour’ before taking the food out. I was just trying to heat leftovers, not enroll in a language course.”
The helpdesk team initially suspected a prank or a case of cross-wiring with a nearby smart speaker. However, testing revealed the microwave model in question—an outdated, non-smart manual unit purchased nearly a decade ago—had absolutely no Bluetooth or Wi-Fi capabilities. “No connection, no software updates, just a button and a dial,” an IT technician confirmed.
Experts in appliance behavior and linguistics weighed in, suggesting that perhaps Dave’s microwave was experiencing a kind of “technological midlife crisis” or had been possessed by the spirit of a French chef with unfulfilled reheating ambitions. Some even speculated that the device was auditioning for voice-over roles in kitchen appliance commercials.
The helpdesk finally resolved the issue with a hard reset (unplugging the microwave and plugging it back in), after which the appliance returned to its traditional silent beep mode. However, Dave says he misses the French lessons and hopes the microwave might “think it over and come back with some Spanish next time.”
Meanwhile, local microwave sales have spiked as neighbors apparently fear their own appliances might start conducting dinner conversations in unexpected languages. One things’s for sure: heating your dinner may never be the same again.