In a shocking yet strangely inspiring turn of events, a single helpdesk ticket has unveiled the true extent of this year’s company budget allocation. What was initially reported as a routine inquiry about a printer issue turned out to be the key to discovering that the CEO had spent the entire annual budget on motivational coffee mugs for the entire staff.
The ticket, submitted by an exasperated employee named Jenna in Marketing, simply read: “Printer won’t print. Also, why do we all now have mugs that say ‘Crush It!’ and ‘You Got This!’ on every desk? We ran out of printer ink, so maybe the budget is hiding in plain sight?”
Upon investigation, the IT department uncovered that while the printer ink was indeed depleted, the real financial mystery lay elsewhere. The finance team confirmed that every cent allocated for office supplies, equipment upgrades, and even the quarterly team-building retreat had been rerouted to a massive order of motivational coffee mugs featuring slogans ranging from “Be the Change” to “Hustle & Flow.”
An anonymous insider revealed, “The CEO apparently had a vision: if the staff sipped from these mugs daily, productivity would skyrocket. The budget spreadsheet actually had a single entry labeled ‘Fuel for Success: 500 Mugs.’ No one questioned it because it sounded like corporate speak.”
Several employees have mixed feelings about the discovery. Some say their new mugs have inspired them to meet deadlines they never thought possible. Others report that their caffeine levels are up, but printer access is down, leading to a backlog of important documents and a lot of very colorful sticky notes.
HR has already scheduled a meeting to discuss possible solutions, including a prize drawing for a “Best Motivated Mug User” to boost morale while the printer problem is resolved — although the ink cartridge costs might need to be crowdfunded.
When contacted for comment, the CEO reportedly said, “I’m just trying to keep the beans brewing and the spirits high. These mugs are an investment in our greatest resource: ourselves.”
Meanwhile, the helpdesk ticket remains open with the subject line: “Printing problems and mug madness.” It may be the most productive ticket in company history—if only because it brewed up a storm of laughs and unexpected productivity advice.