In a bizarre twist that has left cyber security experts both amused and alarmed, a new scam has emerged where cyber criminals are no longer phishing for financial details, but rather, for emotional affirmations. This shift has seen individuals across the globe log into emails from supposedly benevolent princes, not asking for money but for some heartfelt words of encouragement.
The scheme, dubbed “Flattery Phishing,” begins innocuously enough. Recipients receive emails from fictitious characters like “Larry Higgsworth, Duke of Compliments,” or “Princess Serenity of Ego-Boostland,” each desperately seeking reassurance that their haircut was indeed a fantastic choice. Recipients are prompted with questions such as “Am I as fabulous as I believe?” and “Can you remind me how amazing I am?”
Experts are bewildered. Dr. Phil McHughes, head of cyber psychology at the University of Such-and-Such, noted, “They’ve gone from wanting your bank account to wanting you to account for their charm. It’s both ridiculous and slightly ingenious. The emotional vulnerability this plays on is unprecedented. Everyone loves a bit of praise!”
Authorities have issued statements advising people to refrain from responding to these overtures. However, some victims have reported feeling compelled to respond, citing an inexplicable need to reassure these mysterious strangers about their fabulousness. Sally, a recent victim, admitted, “I got an email saying, ‘I hope you realize how remarkable you are at complimenting others.’ I mean, how can you not reply to that! Now they won’t stop sending me pictures of weird haircuts asking for my opinion.”
Laughably, other scammers seem to double-down on the emotional reliance tactic. One popular scam of late involves emails with the subject heading “Is This the Best Selfie You’ve Ever Seen?” Recipients are then flooded with cascades of selfies in various awkward poses, angles, and filters, each desperately seeking validation against a backdrop of exotic leaf patterns and questionable fashion choices.
The Internet Shaming Society, an unsanctioned vigilante group, has started striking back by flooding scammers’ inboxes with quotes of insincerity, including, “You are a shiny star on a cloudy night!” and “Your presence is more refreshing than a damp towel!” Recognizing the irony, the group stated, “We want to fight absurdity with absurdity. For every insincere compliment they seek, we will deploy a thousand more.”
Cyber security firms are in the meantime working overtime to identify the origin of these scams. Hacktress, a leading security company, has partnered with motivational speakers to decode which compliments leave scammers most satisfied and thus traceable. As CEO Spade Wellington points out, “It’s important to underscore, beneath the hilarity, this is an attack on our self-esteem. We must make sure internet users are reassured their compliments are kept secure, and deservedly bestowed on the right people.”
In the meantime, it’s suggested that internet users err on the side of caution, reserving their most effusive praise for people they actually know, rather than users named “Prince Swagger of Affirmationville.” Remember: the ego you save might just be your own.