In a story that’s left both astronomers and gardeners scratching their heads, local astronaut Dave Flanagan has safely returned to Earth after spending three weeks on Mars — only to reveal he believed the Red Planet was actually his next-door neighbour’s garden shed.
Flanagan, a seasoned space explorer known for his stellar—if sometimes offbeat—navigational skills, explained his confusion during a press conference this morning. “When I launched, I was aiming for what I thought was Steve’s shed,” he admitted, referring to the notoriously large and red-painted backyard outbuilding belonging to his neighbour. “It looked a bit rusty, a bit dusty, and pretty remote, so I figured Mars would be a good place to hang out and maybe borrow some lawnmowers.”
The mix-up reportedly began when Flanagan’s wife mentioned Steve had painted his shed red to match the “currently trending Mars aesthetic.” Flanagan, ever the space enthusiast, took this as a universal signal and requested a mission to “check in on the shed.” Mission control, busy handling multiple launches and space junk, apparently missed the memo.
When he finally landed on Mars, Flanagan set up camp, sampled some rocks (which he described as “a bit crunchier than I expected”), and even tried to chat with what he thought were stray cats — actually robotic rovers sent by NASA. “I thought, ‘Steve really loves these cats,’” Flanagan said.
The misunderstanding was only discovered when Steve called Flanagan’s wife asking why her husband hadn’t returned — he had planned to host a shedwarming party and was worried about his tools. NASA officials could not be reached for comment, but an insider did reveal that NASA’s internal communications team is already drafting a new protocol: “Always Double-Check Your Target, Especially If It’s Next Door.”
Despite the mix-up, Flanagan says he enjoyed his trip. “Mars has great views and surprisingly good Wi-Fi,” he joked. Back on Earth, the local community has started a hashtag, #ShedOrMars, hoping to keep the conversation going and maybe prevent similar cosmic confusion.
As for Steve? He’s reportedly considering renaming his shed to “Olympus Mons” to keep up with his famous cosmic visitor. Meanwhile, Flanagan is contemplating a follow-up mission — this time to the attic. “If it’s anything like Mars, I might just find the missing socks in there,” he quipped.