In what can only be described as a caffeine-fueled corporate plot twist, a single helpdesk ticket has come to light revealing that for an entire month, the CEO of CornyTech Solutions unknowingly swapped his daily coffee for a high-octane energy drink, thanks to a well-meaning but disastrously mixed-up office assistant.
The ticket, submitted by office assistant Karen H., was initially dismissed as routine. However, investigation into the issue revealed a series of growing concerns. Karen had accidentally switched the CEO’s usual medium roast coffee beans with a stash of “Blast Off” energy drink powder that had been mislabelled in the breakroom pantry. The error went unnoticed for weeks, despite the CEO exhibiting increasingly unusual behavior: spontaneous conference room dance-offs, uncharacteristic aggressive emailing, and an unprecedented demand for meetings at 4 a.m.
Karen opened the ticket after her second attempt to restock the pantry was greeted by confusion from bewildered colleagues. “I thought maybe the CEO was just trying to get healthier,” she noted, “but when he started scheduling brainstorming sessions on weekends where he just shouted ‘energize!’ repeatedly, I suspected something was up.”
The IT helpdesk’s official response acknowledged the request to “investigate the CEO’s newfound energy madness,” quickly escalating the issue to HR and Facilities Management. The CEO, known for his stoic composure, was described as “jittery but surprisingly productive” throughout the month.
Upon discovery, the CEO reportedly had an immediate craving for his restored medium roast, confessing, “I thought I was developing superpowers or a mild nervous breakdown.” Company insiders joked that the unintentional energy drink experiment drastically increased productivity, but also led to a brief but intense overuse of company memes and spontaneous karaoke sessions.
In response, CornyTech Solutions has instituted a new “Caffeine Verification Protocol,” requiring all beverage supplies to be double-checked and labeled by two employees before consumption in the executive suite.
Karen now faces mandatory comedy workshops to improve her joke delivery—an unfortunate side effect of the CEO’s hyper-energetic state that saw a 237% increase in groan-worthy puns during meetings.
The whole incident stands as a cautionary tale to all office workers: when in doubt, don’t swap someone’s coffee… unless you want to turn corporate leadership into a caffeinated whirlwind of chaos.