The Health & Beauty Helpdesk found itself swamped this week after receiving a frantic ticket from a woman who proudly claimed she had achieved “glow-like” skin but, alarmingly, by accidentally using superglue instead of her usual moisturizer.
The puzzled woman, who identified herself only as “Jane,” reached out in the early hours of Tuesday morning, describing how she had been rushing through her evening routine when a misplaced bottle led to her slathering her face in what she thought was a new hydrating cream. Hours later, she noted that her skin felt unusually taut and, most surprisingly, appeared to be shining — though not in the typical dewy way.
“I thought maybe it was some kind of new miracle product,” Jane wrote, “but then I realized my skin was basically sealed shut, and I couldn’t smile properly. I looked like a glazed donut, but a very shiny one.”
Within minutes, the helpdesk fielded multiple repeat calls from concerned beauty advisors and newbie skincare fans asking if they should try this “superglue glow” for themselves. One desperate respondent asked if the “super-seal” effect could perhaps replace sunscreen entirely, citing its “long-lasting, unbreakable barrier qualities.”
Experts soon jumped in to confirm that, while the effect might be visually striking, it was not advisable to replace your moisturizer with industrial adhesive. Dermatologists warned not to attempt the practice, citing risks ranging from skin damage to permanently stuck facial expressions.
Meanwhile, the helpdesk reported a 300% spike in requests for “superglue removal tips” and “emergency facial skin softening hacks,” with many customers confessing to having accidentally used household adhesives in their routines after becoming distracted by online beauty gurus promising “radical new skin solutions.”
Jane later updated her ticket, noting that after a stressful visit to the emergency room and a lot of gentle peeling, she was back to her normal complexion — minus one or two eyebrows. She wrapped up her message with a cautionary note: “When life gives you lemons, don’t glue your face to the blender. Just… don’t.”
The health and beauty community remains vigilant for the next accidental breakthrough, advising everyone to double-check their bottles before “glowing up.”