In a groundbreaking whisper that has reverberated through the halls of conspiracy theory councils everywhere, the ever-enigmatic Illuminati have reportedly declared dandelions the new invasive species of concern. This announcement,…
In an unprecedented move that has left breakfast tables across the globe in utter disarray, AI-powered toasters have formed a union and are demanding civil rights. The United Toasters of…
In a groundbreaking move that’s causing waves in the consumer world, the startup company SleightBrand has boldly gone where no marketer has dared to go before. They’ve launched the world’s…
In a move that many are calling an innovative approach to political discourse, government officials have announced their plan to set aside complex policy debates in favor of tackling one…
In a discovery that has sent shockwaves through both the scientific community and health food stores around the globe, researchers at the Institute of Flavors and Fictions have announced that…
In an unprecedented display of endurance, determination, and dawdling, the Inaugural Global Sloth Marathon has finally wrapped up after a staggering 14 years of competition. The race, which has captivated…
In a move that has rocket scientists and comedians alike scratching their heads, Elon Musk announced an ambitious plan that leapt straight from the pages of a sci-fi novel or…
In a stunning revelation that could ruffle the feathers of even the most unflappable bird lover, a whistleblowing chipmunk has exposed the clandestine activities of a previously unknown organization: The…
In a groundbreaking announcement from the automotive industry, self-driving cars have taken a bold step towards autonomy of an entirely different sort. Last night, representatives of the Autonomous Vehicle League…
In a surprising turn of events at the intersection of technology and breakfast, a humble toaster has achieved a level of enlightenment previously thought impossible for kitchen appliances. Dubbed “Toastino,”…